Trying to update here!

Okay, so my initial plan of doing five of these a day went to hell pretty quickly, but I'm trying. I'm doing this in the spare time I get between working on getting a film ready to shoot, taking care of my son, and other duties which is leaving me pretty behind, as usual. But I'll take what I can get I suppose. Onwards and upwards.



Code Red DVD are probably the masters at bringing me movies I should have watched in my childhood but somehow never did. Every film they release feels right at home with every other film I watched incessantly growing up, and Hot Moves would be a perfect companion to the other flicks channels like USA and TNT would air late at night. When they weren't playing horror movies, they'd be running wacky teenager movies like The Last American Virgin and Fraternity Vacation. I'm surprised this never made the rounds back then. The basic plot was ripped off in American Pie, a bunch of nerds commit to losing their virginity by the end of the summer, cue wacky hijinks. The one thing that helps the movie is that compared to the American Pie films, this film feels honest. These guys are truly hideous nerds, not like the "nerds" we see in modern teen films, who are really usually models dressed in bad clothing. I mean, does anyone buy that Chris Klein wouldn't have at least date-raped someone by the time he was a senior? On the other side of the coin, it wouldn't be too hard of a stretch to buy that these guys are still virgins twenty years after this movie. There are times where the movie feels creaky, and it's easy to see that it's pretty much just a series of set-pieces hung around the basic idea, but dammit, it's fun. A good time waster that reminds of you that not every movie about teens was filled with cellphone ads and emo music.
Sights within:
-Upon their first encounter with a hooker, they manage to burn her fucking house down. Genius.
-World's most gratuitous use of Venice Beach stock footage.
-You really have to wonder if some of these kids weren't like 15 at the time.
-World's best parody of Chariots of Fire.
Grade: B-
(Apparently, there are no trailers for this anywhere online, sadly. So just pretend you saw something funny here and move along.)


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



We figured since we had so much luck with Beach Blanket Bingo, we'd try out another of these Beach movies we've got laying around here but came up a lot shorter than last time. There's still some fun in here but nowhere near as much as the last one. Apparently, this was the last one with Frankie and Annette and at this point all parties had decided to check out, appearing only due to contractual obligations. The setup involves Frankie being stuck on a deserted island (and landing him probably only two days worth of shooting at the same time) and being tormented by the notion that Annette is too much of a whore to be left alone (though he states it in much nicer terms). I don't know if he just has overwhelming feelings of insecurity about his relationship or if Annette has been playing the surfing rounds between movies, but he finds a witch doctor (played by Buster Keaton!) who sends out a pelican to watch over Annette and make sure she's not sleeping around. This bird arrives just in time for some douche-bag to show up and come on to her, and the local Nazi bike leader decides to go clean, and some other stuff happens, and some others, and yadda yadda. Honestly, the movie seems to lose steam after about twenty minutes, yet still drags itself along until it culminates in a motorcycle race played in fast motion. That eternal opportunist Mickey Rooney even shows up to do some reality show shenanigans decades before there were reality shows, but he's nowhere near as funny as Don Rickles, or even anything in the last film. It's worth a watch, but maybe get some housework done while it's playing. If you're like me, you'll feel compelled to do it anyways about halfway through.
Sights within:
-Buster Keaton in a grass skirt.
-A fairly pregnant Annette Funicello in a bikini movie. I know, right?
-The world's most tedious serenade by motorcycle.
-Mickey Rooney copping a feel, pretty fucking blatantly.
-A climax that I'm pretty sure was ripped off from Wacky Races.
-A pelican that manages to live up to the thespian legacy of Frankie Avalon.
-Speaking of which, if you want to catch a truly nutball Frankie Avalon flick, try to find Blood Song, where he whistles a friendly jaunt as he stalks and kills teenagers slasher-style across the Oregon valley. It's bugshit crazy.
Grade: C-



------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



You can look back at the history of Charles Band's Full Moon company and see the different stages it's gone through. Between the period of the glory days of Paramount-backed funding and bottom barrel DV-dreck there was a time where Charles lost his shit. Seriously. Blood Dolls is unbelievably insane, with no logic anywhere to be found. Head of the Family hails from this same period, though it's not as entertaining as Dolls. The movie mashes together a pretty typical film noir storyline with outlandish hillbilly freaks, not shying away from every redneck stereotype possible. The lead actor is surprisingly charismatic and his back and forth with the title character is always funny. He's the only character worth caring about, though, and I think that's why the movie starts to drag after so long, before it finishes off with a pretty good punchline. It may not be the best of Full Moon's oeuvre, but after watching shit like Talisman, you'll find a whole new respect for how batshit this film is.
Sights within:
-Just looking at the box-art is a sight itself.
-World's longest running "I-sent-a-letter-and-if-anything-happens-to-me-..." gag.
-Lance seems like Viggo Mortenson's slimeball ex-con brother.
-If you want to see pretty much the whole movie, just watch the damn trailer. Pretty much spells everything out.
Grade: C



------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Mario Bava is primarily known for his horror movies, but his excursions into other genres are just as memorable. This film was one of two he made in the peplum sub-genre. The story sets two brothers separated by war, one taken in by royalty, the other taken in by the clan of Viking warriors that had been defeated by the king, shortly before being killed himself by one of his traitorous generals. The movie gets you looking forward to their eventual reunion in the climax, but when it does come it feels a little anticlimactic. Once they realize who each other is, it amounts to "Oh, hey. Cool. How's it going?" before the story turns its attention back to the murderous general. Other than that, the movie's highly entertaining, in line with the older swashbuckling movies that aren't really made anymore. This one is elevated simply because Bava is at the helm. Even when there's absolutely no call for it, his multicolored lighting and camera work bring a style to the film that's great to watch, giving all of the Viking rituals a sense of magic. Definitely worth checking out.
Sights within:
-Cameron Mitchell looking like a reject from southern California.
-World's biggest underground tree. With purple lighting.
-A sequence involving arrows up the side of a castle which was ripped off wholesale in the recent Prince of Persia movie.
-Big burly Vikings in short skirts and bleached hair.
Grade: B



------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Yeee-haaaawww! There be some shenanigans goin' down over at yonder swamp. Sees, there be some blonde taken in by a good ol' boy swamp-water abortionist and raised as his own chilin'. This blonde swamp rat comes to be a local legend down 'round the town's waterin' holes. Shitkickers about town tries to pin down some no-good like murder on 'er, leadin' to a good ol' fashioned swamp-stomping. The film's fun enough but, as is in most cases with no-budget exploitation films, it gets bogged down with simply trying to come up with shit to do. There's poachers, felons, and yuppie assholes all trekking through with some kind of angle to eat up some running time. Everything comes together in a climax that makes you wonder if it had been written on the spot.
Sights within:
-A girl who lives in the swamp with apparently only one item of clothing that never gets so much of a spec of dirt on it. Ever.
-Ferlin Husky's theme song. Yep.
-A scene involving snakes that gets pretty dark completely out of nowhere.
-World's most fucked up twist ending, rendering the prior two minutes of the film pretty fucking messed up.
Grade: C-



Movies Watched: 5
-Hot Moves
-How to Stuff a Wild Bikini
-Head of the Family
-Erik the Conqueror
-Swamp Girl
New Movies Bought: 2
-Tetsuo 2: The Body Hammer
-Trick R Treat
Unseen DVDS: 3237
Unseen Blu-rays: 72
Unseen VHS: 119

Tranced Edition

I'm still desperately trying to catch up on the films I've seen. I'm still writing up movies I watched back in April and there's another thirty or so after this. Right now I'm on break from school and I'm freshly laid off so I should be able to have enough time to catch up here soon. I'll aim for at least five write-ups a day and I should be able to get back to speed in a few weeks. Here's hoping anyways.


Fun time travel movie with Tim Thomerson barking out smart-ass remarks as he falls in with Helen Hunt and hunts space-vampire-zombie fucking things. To be honest, the definition of what exactly a Trancer is changes depending on what movie, or even what scene, you're watching. All I know is Jack Deth kills 'em reals good like and looks cool doing it. This is the best one and it's a steady slide downwards as you go on.
Sights within:
-World's most unexpected Santa beating
-I like how Jack actively goes out of his way to achieve that slicked-back sleaze-ball look.
-Tanning salons can be a bitch.
Grade: B+



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



More of the same but with less of the luster. Somehow they got everyone from the original back and added Megan Ward who plays Jack Deth's wife. What could have been a fun situation with both wives fighting over Jack (with what eventually could have lead to Jack turning to the camera and shrugging his shoulders exaggeratedly expressing his wonderment at getting caught in these kinds of situations while canned audience laughter backs him up) is pretty much left alone after the initial set-up and taken seriously. The budget's not as high and neither is the laughs but there's still some fun to be had, even if I have no idea what the actual plot is by now. I think Jeffrey Combs pops up for a couple of minutes, or was that the third one? I don't know. I do know that Richard Lynch was the bad guy in one of them and Andrew Robinson is in the other. Guess it doesn't matter too much which is which. Still worth checking out.
Sights within:
-Somehow they decided the drunk ex-baseball player was a valuable enough character to bring him back?
-World's slowest escape and shoot out. Young Guns this isn't.
-Lena? Is that a real name that exists outside of video-games?
-I've probably watched the trailer for this a thousand times growing up. In fact I can quote the whole thing from the video down below. Somehow I just now got around to actually watching the movie.
Grade: C+



------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



That smooth talkin' sonofabitch is back yet again to kill more Trancers, whatever the hell they are. This time, good ol' Larry Cotton is building an army of Trancer soldiers and Jack Deth has to take them out before some vague "bad stuff" happens in the future. The story seems to be not far off from the plot of part 2 and the treads are starting to really show by now. Tim Thomerson is as fun to watch as ever but every thing else is pretty dis-interesting. This would be the last one I'd even suggest checking out, and that's only on the strength of the Jack Deth character alone.
Sights within:
-World's most obvious appearance due to contractual obligations. Mad About You had to have started by now.
-That shark-guy thing would have made a much more interesting villain than his two appearances as a good guy. But hey, what do I know? I only pay to own these things.
-When the bad guys have automatic weapons and hide behind cover, always walk into the open room and take them out with your 9mm. It'll work everytime.
Grade: C-



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Jack gets sent back in time to Romania to save a few bucks for Charles Band. Back when Full Moon was about to lose it's funding from Paramount, Chuck Band strung out as many of his heavy hitters as he could by filming multiple sequels back to back in order to get the most return for his money. Victims of this extortion method also included the Subspecies and Puppet Master films, though I have to say Trancers got the worst treatment out of all of them. Jack arrives, people thinks he's a god or magic or some shit and defeats the evil wizard, yadda yadda. Really, it's the same old storyline you've seen a hundred times only with Tim Thomerson's wisecrack's making any kind of difference. Ultimately, not worth the seventy minutes running time to watch.
Sights within:
-Shit if I know. Some castles? I don't know.
-World's clunkiest sword fights.
-At this point, Jack Deth's coat is starting to look a little too feminine for him.
Grade: D



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Some more shit in medieval days. Jack teams up with a Trancer to stop the same damn guy they already killed, newly resurrected due to a mystical painting or something. Supposedly this is to give Jack a new angle on Trancers and not be so much of a hardass, which isn't that the whole reason to watch these things? It all boils down to some generic horseback riding and sword-swinging with early-days After Effects sprinkled here and there. The whole time I couldn't shake the feeling that I had more important things to do and was fighting that itch to hit the fast forward button. I don't think any series demonstrates the law of diminishing returns than the Trancers series. Just stop at part 3 and consider it done.
Sights within:
-Is that not the world's worst fucking poster? Is that horse on steroids? How the hell did they get up there? That's the worst pose I've ever seen a man strike. It reminds me of the crappy sci-fi books I would toss to the side when digging through garage sales back when I was twelve.
-World's whiniest vampire-thing, other than Twilight.
-It's five films in now and there is still no concrete definition of just what the fuck is a Trancer anyways? Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!
-What do you mean there's a fucking sixth one?



Movies Watched: 5
-Trancers
-Trancers 2
-Trancers 3
-Trancers 4
-Trancers 5
New Movies Bought: 0
Unseen DVDS: 3241
Unseen Blu-rays: 71
Unseen VHS: 119

April Catch-Up

Well, April's come and gone and I've fallen way behind. I managed to get through a lot more unseen movies, though not as many as I would have liked. In my favor, at least, the only new movies added were from a set I didn't expect to actually ship, sending my bank account into the negative. And due to tight financial problems as well as having to shoot my senior film soon, I won't be adding anymore new movies for quite a while, giving me time to make some headway. I watched some of these movies quite a while ago so if the comments seem kind of light, that's why. I'm just trying to speed through them so I can get caught up and start posting some new features I'm wanting to work on. I'm still working on making this thing look good as well. I'm not really proficient on layouts and the coding involved or anything, it's just not my bag really. If anyone has any tips or improvements I can make just fire them my way. On to the drivel.



I'll be honest, there's not a lot that I remember from this at the moment. I do know that after coming off the high that was Black Belt Jones, this could only be seen as a disappointment so maybe it's not fair to really tear into it anyways. It does take place in China, to its credit, and it was nice seeing a change of locale, even if the story was pretty stock and it didn't carry the same fun-quotient as Black Belt. This is one I'll have to return to and watch again to give it a fair shake.
Sights within:
-"Hey brother, you believe in non-violence? Then you won't object while I take your car."
-Time tested "fall in love with one broad but then consoles himself with her twin when the original dies" plot device
-The world's largest amount of color coordinated henchmen.
-Jim Kelly riding a fucking elephant.
-The world's most boring tiger footage repeated ad-nauseum.
-Rhino, the world's most annoying character in a pre-CGI world.
-The world's most anticlimactic end battle other than Transformers 2.
Grade: D+


------------------------------------------------------------------------------



As far as blaxploitation movies go, this is the equivalent of Wolverine, Batman, and the Punisher teaming up. Or at least it should be. Problem is, they spend most of the movie doing their own thing, though they more than manage to hold their own separately. Still, one of the most alluring aspects of this was the inherently awesome concept of these actors teaming up. The few times they do meet up is a thing of beauty. The plot is ludicrous but also fits the tone of the movie perfectly. There are a few moments where the film drags due to excessive padding but it picks right back up each time. The one thing this film does right with no exceptions is present these actors as the biggest bad-asses in their field. There's one scene so good, it instantly qualifies for a spot on any "top ten badass moments in cinema history" list (also spoofed in I'm Gonna Git You, Sucka). A great time, but it could have been pushed even further to become the top of the genre.
Sights within:
-"Gonna set ME up?"
-The world's greatest fucking scene involving Jim Kelly vs. a slew of cops.
-Jim Brown's never ending ammunition.
-The world's only film where the idea of the white man isolating the black gene and creating a poison that specifically targets the race it wants to kill and leaking it into the water supply is played completely straight.
-Did you see that motherfucker get kicked onto the trunk of the car? Ow.
-The world's most friendly, polite and complacent hostages.
-Then he's just standing in the middle of the road having a conversation after laying out a dozen cops, probably killing a few.
-I'm sorry, I just can't get over that scene.
-The world needs more actors/heroes like the kind in this film. We've gone too soft in our action movies.
Grade: B



---------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I watched the Mystery Science Theater version so this is more of a review of the episode rather than the movie. They do a good job of taking care of the movie itself anyway. The movie itself didn't seem too bad. If I had watched it as a kid, I could see myself getting some kind of dumb enjoyment out of it, no matter how technically deficient it is. The episode was one of the better ones and really enjoyed it. And...that's all I got.
Sights within:
-"Honest, Roxy, I believe you! I swear on my Elvis Presley LP."
-Jaws in a loincloth.
-That insufferable little toad Arch Hall and his podunk beachcomber.
-The world's most delicious sulfuric water.
Grade: B



---------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I know I've seen bits of this before growing up in the glorious age before TNT and TBS became the epicenter for reruns of Friends and Law & Order, but I decided to count pretty much all of the Harryhausen as unseen movies (save for Clash of the Titans which I've seen about twenty times) since I've never really sat down and watched them from start to finish. This one in particular I don't recall ever watching save for about ten minutes once before school one day so I figured I start out with this one as I revisit them all. As a kid, Greek mythology was a huge interest to me and I was surprised how well I still knew this story, though that could have been helped by that awesome Ducktales retelling. What follows here is your average special effects laden adventure story. It's kind of funny how the same old formula still works even in today's summer movies. A group of men, with at least a few given their own unique personalities so you have someone to feel for when they're squished by the upcoming monsters, on a mission for some object/purpose while coming across scattered, almost random, challenges which are really just excuses for the special effects which bring in tickets. It's apparently worked for decades, so why stop now? The one thing that elevates this one is the effects of Ray Harryhausen, who somehow makes everyone of his creations memorable. They have a sense of character that probably only Willis O'Brien could match. Without them, I don't think any of these movies would be remembered as well as they are today.
Sights within:
-"You can growl away all you like, Zeus. I mean what I say."
-The world's manliest rock skipping contest.
-Hercules just can't keep his fucking hands off those treasures.
-A living metal statue brought down by the equivalent of stepping on a tack.
-Some old bastard tormented daily by screeching harpies.
-The world's biggest merman and his bathtub toys.
-The world's coolest sword fight sequence that obviously inspired Sam Raimi decades later.
Grade: B-



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I have this as part of a twenty-movie set called Burnt Rubber which I picked up for five bucks at Wally World, usually a sign of generic crap delivered in VHS-quality transfers at best. Initially, I threw this on as some background noise while I worked on some writing as I didn't have any expectations for it. I ended up not getting any writing done as it turned out to be a lot more entertaining than I thought it would be. This film was cobbled together by crew members of the original Gone in 60 Seconds and one can tell the similarities. Both focus on extended car chases and keep the stunts as the central focus of the movie while still telling a fun, yet shallow story. Basically, a couple of cops (one sporting a wicked 'stache)decide to pick up some extra cash by working for a repo company. Booooyyy howdy, is there some egg on their faces when they find out all of them cars are stolen goods leading to some high-shootin' showdowns with the good ol' boys of the Southern California highway patrol before they set to gettin' even with the boss. Nothing in this film is especially mind-blowing but there are definitely worse ways to kill an hour and a half.
Sights within:
-"Vroooom"
-Cops who decide that chasing a dune buggy isn't worth their sweet time.
-That buggy tore ass, though. I'll give them that.
-The world's most rockin' 'stache.
-A car chase which consists of a Pinto being followed by a cop car down a flight of stairs that aren't even as wide as a sidewalk.
-The world's long winded, convoluted, sorry-assed excuse for showing up late for a date, which somehow still works.
Grade: B-



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------


This film probably has more racism within than the entire miniseries of Roots. William Sanderson (Larry of Newhart fame) plays what is probably one of the most vile characters ever to disgrace a screen. He, along with two other deranged convicts, escapes from the law and make a retreat into the countryside, blowing away a liquor store owner in front of his own infant daughter, eventually holing up inside the abode of a happy, moralistic African American family. What follows is roughly 50 minutes of degradation, murder, and abuse before the family fights back. This movie isn't the easiest film to watch and you'd be hard pressed to find sleazier characters in any movie, save for maybe one starring David Hess. By the time the family makes their stand, you're ready to see these bastards pay which I suppose means the film succeeds in what it's trying to do. It's a great film worth watching, but I'm not sure if it's one you'd want to revisit very often if you'd rather not see the more rotten side of humanity.
Sights within:
-"I'm running the show, Deputy Dawg!"
-For a few moments, you thought this movie was going to be about that pimp, didn't you?
-Probably one of the more ineffective cops I've seen in a movie.
-Never has dancing felt so humiliating.
-The world's most fucked up dinner party.
-No, little Timmy, nooo!!
-The world's most convenient time to get your sonar running. Talk about laying it all out.
-You mean the cover-art lied?!
Grade: B+


I'm going to end it here so I can actually get a post up and running. I've still got like thirty more flicks to write up so hopefully I can get caught up. Luckily, I've only managed to watch two movies in the entire month of May so far so I just might have a chance of getting up to speed. It's not like I have anything else to do for six damned hours every Wednesday. Hope to be back soon. Now on to the absolutely worthless totals.

Movies Watched: 6
-Hot Potato
-Three the Hard Way
-Eegah!
-Jason and the Argonauts
-Double Nickels
-Fight for Your Life
New Movies Bought: 5
-Murders in the Zoo
-The Mad Doctor of Market Street
-The Strange Case of Doctor Rx
-The Mad Ghoul
-House of Horrors
Unseen DVDS: 3246
Unseen Blu-rays: 71
Unseen VHS: 119

The Opening Salvo

It's nice being able to give a decent sized update without having brought home any new movies, though it's not so nice having to worry about money again. Because of partaking in DVDTalk's first Exploitation/Drive-In/B-Movie Challenge, I've already gotten through a chunk of titles, though it also helps that I skipped a couple days of work in a vain attempt to extend my paltry spring break as long as I can. My movie watching's going to take a hit when I start going to work again regularly and the new school term starts (assuming my current enrollment problems get straightened out). So far, it's been a fun little challenge that leaves a lot of room for plenty of diversity amongst the films. I'm trying to avoid horror movies as much as I can because I plan on completely vegging out with them for the October challenge as part of my graduation/quitting my job celebration, which is also why you haven't really seen any blurbs about them so far on here. Out of the films watched so far, only one of them was a bore. In fact it's actually hard to grade these films as they're all pretty fun to watch even though they can't really be called good movies, so keep that in mind when reading.



This was probably Mario Bava's most commercial film, even at only $500,000, and it shows. The sets are amazing and shows how impressive physical locations can be, though admittedly they were married with matte-paintings though I couldn't even tell at first, rather than green-screening in a cartoon background. The action is outlandish with heists galore. It's obvious that this was Italy's attempt to create their own James Bond-like series but for some reason it never took off, despite Bava bringing it in for a fifth of the budget he was allotted. I think the biggest issue was Diabolik himself. He's supposed to be the main character you root for, but he alternates between being an asshole and a puppet the whole time. He kills completely innocent cops and cripples the nation because they piss him off. The rest of the time, his girlfriend is slipping him sleeping pills lest he begin to wwander in his off time and then ordering to steal her new jewelry. You actually think he deserves to be caught, even with his amazing eyebrows. I do think this was the perfect film to kick off the challenge since it has the perfect mixture of laughably bad moments coupled with the amazing ingenuity that comes along with truly great low-budget filmmakers.
Sights within:
-Probably the world's first metro-sexual.
-Use of both Exhilaration Capsules and Anti-Exhiliration Capsules.
-An opening sequence that could fill-in as a scene from the Spy Hunter video game.
-The world's largest revolving bed.
-Mobsters who have an enchanted Etch-A-Sketch.
-1 of 2 movies in the span of two days where a Polaroid has aided robbery attempts.
-The world's most annoying suction cups.
-A mid-air action sequence pre-dating Shoot 'Em Up.
-The old Tibetan-lama "I'm not really dead!" gag.
-An entire nation's tax records completely blown away, probably inspiring a young Tyler Durden.
-A man coated in gold, leaving him to look like someone's nasty #2.
-A tease for a sequel that some 32 years later, still hasn't happened.
-Ask Eva.
Grade: B






Probably the most famous of the now-seemingly ludicrous parental cautionary films (whew!), it holds some genuine laughs even for someone like me who doesn't care for the substance. The nation's constant mishandling of the drug from day one is chronicled in the great documentary Grass, so I'm not even going to bother going into that aspect when that film does it better than I ever could. The film itself is primarily made up of long stretches filled with scenes out of a Leave it to Beaver episode though with more wooden acting punctuated by hilarity when someone's all hopped up on the doobie. There's fun here, but you have to get through some bad stretches, even in its 67 minute running time.
Sights within:
-The world's most gentle hit and run.
-The world's most inept/lazy hit and run investigation.
-Issues of rape in a '30's movie where you expect everything filmed then to be all cuddly.
-A teenage kid being sentenced to a hanging.
-The world's cleanliest bullet hole.
-The fastest little piano diddy you ever did see.
Grade: B-






A much more entertaining film than the more well-known Reefer Madness, this movie is supposed to warn people against the evils of the "giggle-weed" but ends up showcasing the dangers of booze and heroin instead with pot playing more of a minor role here. Unlike Reefer Madness, this film seems to have been made with exploitation in mind with a ham-fisted plot and enough lurid moments to titillate the audience, even closing with a twist ending that wouldn't feel out of place in an old E.C Comics tale. The best of the triple feature disc I have.
Sights within:
-Attempted date rape which is completely forgiven literally 20 seconds later.
-Skinny dipping under the influence.
-A bunch of ogre-like giggling loons running around doing the aforementioned skinny dipping.
-One of the world's earliest "drug-deal-gone-wrong" scenes filmed.
-The main girl goes from scared do-goody to tough-talkin' dope dealer within one cut of film. Amazing.
-Apparently when you die in this film, piles of joints rain down in order the justify the film's message.
Grade: B






The last feature on the disc sure didn't end things well. There wasn't a lot of fun to be had here. The film comes across a lot more serious than the other two and alternates between being dull and depressing. A girl goes from country bumpkin to gangster's moll in the span of five minutes with her brother going out to find her only to end up becoming addicted to the smack her husband peddles. It's the same kind of plot every other one of these films have, except without one iota of the campy fun.
Sights within:
-A gangster holding a gun on a waitress as she serves two cops in order to hide him, thinking he's the good guy the whole time.
-The saddest, most hopeful mother you'll probably ever see.
-Quite liberal use of "headache powder."
-Wallpaper adorned with dead rats.
-The world's most depressing 1930's expectant-mother suicide.
-Drugs are bad. m'kay?
Grade: C-






We had watched Cannibal Holocaust (I had already seen it before so I'm not doing the full write-up here) and it had left my wife so disturbed that I put this on to help her feel better. I had never seen any of these before, save for the reunion movie from the late 80's, so it was nice finally being able to sit down with one. I was actually surprised at how genuinely funny it was. The writing had a lot of clever lines and all of the characters were pretty enjoyable. Paul Lynde was a great smart-ass and it was cool seeing Don Rickles insult everyone like only he can. I can see why these movies were popular back when they were made as they make for nice, breezy fun.
Sights within:
-Peppermint airplanes.
-The ol' mermaid plot device.
-I have no idea how anyone thought Paul Lynde wasn't gay.
-See a young Don Rickles, who still looked fucking old!
-Young lads feeding weenies to each other.
-Nazi bikers used to comedic effect!
-The world's most unexpected buzzsaw torture sequence.
-The world's most missing justification for having "Bingo" in the title and trailer.
Grade: B+






80's sleaze, the kind I grew up with. It sets itself up as a revenge movie, but I have to say that the whole movie was just too fun to really feel pumped up for it. It's bad, it's campy, it's overwrought, it's exploitative, but it never felt boring, save for a stretch at the very end. Linda Blair somehow thinks she's a badass, even though she has the face of a Disney chipmunk, and spends the majority of the film trying to prove it. The whole movie is shot slick as a whip with perfect camera moves and a style that makes it feel more expensive than it really is. The only real issue the movie had was that by the time it got to the actual revenge, it felt a little too passive, with Blair suddenly losing all of her street act to become a standard slasher heroine.
Sights within:
-Linda Blair suited in leather brandishing a crossbow. Nope, it doesn't sell.
-The world's most low-budget night club.
-Howard Vernon becoming the coolest character in the movie.
-"Go fuck an iceberg."
-The world's ugliest high school jock.
-A deaf mute Linnea Quigley, automatically making it her best performance.
-Gratuitous bathtub shot for ABSOLUTELY.NO.GODDAMN.REASON.
-The world's most spiteful science teacher.
Grade: B+






Thus far, this was easily the funnest of all the films I've watched for the challenge. Full of great one-liners, great fight scenes, and tons of those little off-hand moments that adds to the character of the movie. In fact, I'd go so far to say that this is my favorite blaxploitation film thus far. Jim Kelly has a charisma that sells the film right away and you get the feeling that everyone was out to just have a good time. A must see and you can even get it in a set with three other pretty good blaxploitation films for only about ten bucks.
Sights within:
-A fight ended by shooting a man in the ass.
-The world's most awesome scene where Scatman Crothers performs kung-fu!
-The second film where-in a Polaroid aids and abets a robbery.
-The world's two biggest assholes terrorizing an entire beach in the name of foreplay.
-Pinky, the world's most entertaining villain.
-A car chase wherein a pair of panties has its own subplot.
-The world record for number of guys having their heads kicked through train windows.
-Jim Kelly performing the karate shuffle just to hit an elevator button.
-The world's longest fight taking place in a mountainous pile of soap suds.
Grade: A


There's a few more movies I've seen but I'm going to have to take a powder. This has already run long enough and I'm sure most people have tuned out by now so I'm going to leave this as a "to be continued." Now on to the stats which are completely useless and uninteresting to everyone else but me.


Movies Watched: 7
- Danger:Diabolik
- Reefer Madness
- Marihuana
- The Cocaine Fiends
- Beach Blanket Bingo
- Savage Streets
- Black Belt Jones
New Movies Bought: 0 (Achievement Unlocked!)
Unseen DVDS: 3247
Unseen Blu-rays: 71
Unseen VHS: 119

Spring Break Update

The last few weeks of school pretty shut down any time I would have had to post new updates so this one will probably run a little long again, though I'll try to keep my comments brief. I want to get caught up because DVDTalk is having a challenge where the goal is to watch 100 exploitation or B-movies within the month and I'd like to have a clean palate to start it with. This post also heralds the last of my tax refund money so there won't be many new additions for a little while. Hopefully there won't be anymore Criterions going OOP to suck my money away. If I have time this month, I'm hoping to start up a few new features here at the blog so that it'll be interesting beyond just what crap I've been watching. Also, I'll be starting up a whole other blog dedicated to a particular sub-genre I've been obsessed with since infancy so be on the look out for that as well. Now, onto the babbling.



Growing up with David Lynch as your father has got to effect you in someway, and Surveillance can attest to that. What should just be a simple unraveling of an incident along the roadside leads to a convoluted, twisted, grimy mystery that leaves you with a new-found distaste for human nature. The acting is all top-notch, though I'd watch just about anything with Bill Pullman in it. And it's nice to see actors like French Stewart given a chance to show what they're really capable of. I guessed the big reveal about six minutes in, but the film was still compelling enough that I didn't even mind, even if it did leave me cold and depressed afterward.
Grade: A




I don't know, what everyone describes as "one bad-assed movie" just left me in the middle of the road. It's not bad but it's not great either. The story's nothing that new but it is entertaining throughout. On one hand, the ending's pretty anti-climatic, but on the other hand I did respect what it was doing. Maybe it was because every single actor in the film was horrible, save for Eastwood who at times felt just as bad simply because he had surrounded himself with all of these non-actors. It was fun as hell to see him acclimate himself with this whole other culture but beyond that I had no emotional investment with the story itself which felt more and more rote as it went on. It just feels like I should like it more than I do and I'm not sure why.
Grade: C+




As much of a fan of Fight Club and other Palahniukisms, I just couldn't get into this one. I haven't read the book so I have no idea how faithful it is or if maybe it would come across as more interesting when read. The biggest problem for me was that I just didn't care about anything in the movie. Most of the film just felt as though it was being weird for the sake of being weird than for actually having a purpose. The only compliments I can give it is that Sam Rockwell was pretty good and whenever it flash-backed to Anjelica Huston as his mom, the film actually felt like it was coming to life, and then it jumped back to present day and flat-lined again. This might be one I come back to in a few years to give it another chance, but for now, it's just not for me.
Grade: D+




You may not know this about me, but for the first six years of my life, I had planned in following in the footsteps of Sam Kinison and Rodney Dangerfield and becoming a stand up comedian. As I became more and more withdrawn from the world and retreated into the world of cinema, that plan fell by the wayside. However, I've continued to have a passionate interest in at least watching stand-up and tend to watch whatever I can. I was looking forward to this film as it has early performances from a lot of future stars, but as I watched it, I realized why these shows weren't really repeated once they hit it big. There's nothing really stand out here and everyone, Chris Rock in particular, seemed pretty bored. To be honest, there's not much I remember from it, hence the filler at the beginning of my review.
Grade: C-



Yeah, you're seeing right. It's the same DVD cover. That's because I watched the B-feature on the disc, The Heavyweights of Comedy, as well. I don't know what it is, but somehow fat people are funny. Well, most of them are. I don't really see myself as coming across as "funny." And I don't mean funny-lookin' either, smart ass. This was a concert that focused on the heavier side of stand-up, and for the most part, fares much better than the A-feature. The comedians are energetic and bring their personalities across very well, even while covering the same ol' topics as sex, race, New York, and eating.
Grade: B-




Wow. As an adult, I can count on one hand the number of films that have kept me up laying in bed at night, too haunted to fall asleep. Maybe, the BBC's Ghostwatch, The Changeling, and a few others. I would have never guessed that this film would have joined them. Nothing scares me more than what is left to the imagination. The intangible horrors my mind can conjure up trumps anything that's blared out on the screen. By spending the whole film with this man, getting to know him and understand why he is the way he is, then leaving the image of his ultimate demise to be formed by the various descriptions given by others, as well as Herzog's own shell-shocked reaction to the tape, it creates this emotionally twisted and damaging depiction that's constantly haunted my thoughts since watching it. That's not to say the film's success only relies on this aspect. The film depicts the man as a fully realized and heavily damaged little boy trying to live in his own idealized world, only to have the chaos that is life constantly slap him in the face. There is a quiet beauty in the footage of wilderness that still appears as if man doesn't matter. When the film begins to lead up to Treadwell's demise, you can feel the impending doom become almost oppressive. If more horror films could learn some lessons from this film, I could die happy.
Grade: A+




Bleh. For some reason, these Family Guy Star Wars specials just don' come across as very funny to me. I don't know if it's because they're following the films a little too closely or if I'm just completely dead to all things Star Wars anymore. There's some laughs here and there but it just doesn't live up to even the show's weakest episodes. Robot Chicken is completely blowing these Family Guy specials away.
Grade: C-




What an emotional u-turn. When you put in a movie marketed the way this was, you expect a somewhat fun time with a message at the end, not a strung-out, depressing, revisiting of all of those horrible emotions you had hoped you abandoned as you grew older. There wasn't a lot that felt fun in this movie. Instead, just about the entire running time felt like a psychological exam of a child. These monsters are menacing and do nothing but spew out raw emotions, cutting through the shells we've built around us as we hardened to the world's edges. Through it all, the film has an almost overwhelming sense of beauty with the landscapes and the monsters creating a completely believable setting for a child's imagination. After it was over, I felt drained but better for it, almost like what an intense therapy session would presumably feel like. I could only imagine watching this as a child myself, but I have a feeling that most kids would come away with the fact that this film truly got them and who they are.
Grade: A




Hands down, despite a plethora of other great shows, Rescue Me stands as my own favorite show still running, even if I have to play catch-up with the DVDs in order to watch it which sucks when you have to wait about a year to finally see how the cliffhanger's been resolved. Since I've fallen behind so far with all of my DVDs, I at least know that there's already two other seasons to catch up with without having to wait too long. This season was probably the weakest of the show so far, but that didn't make it any less fun or compelling. Even though you could probably figure out what would happen after the third season's ending, it still was able to keep some details in the air until the final beat of the first episode which was great. Overall, it still had the same feel as other seasons, though it had way less of Sheila and a little too much of Gavin's new girlfriends which alternated between boring and annoying. Surprisingly, the most interesting character in this season was Garrity as he dealt with his divorce and tries to turn himself into an alcoholic in order to fit in. This season didn't end with a huge shocker but was more about leaving the characters with a whole new set of emotional issues to deal with. If anyone hasn't been watching this show, they need to get on that pronto.
Grade: B





I will give the film credit. At no point does it feel "preachy," something I have to give props to given how schmaltzy these movies typically are, i.e. Crash. While it's certainly better than that claptrap, I'd say it's also better than the director's own 21 Grams, even though it suffers from the same faults as that movie. Only two stories out of the featured four were interesting me, the Moroccan family and the nanny who took the kids to Mexico. The Brad Pitt story didn't feel like anything special and I'm not sure why he got the raves that he did for the film since he's pretty much acted circles around what he's done here in prior movies. The Japanese story just felt as though it had an idea but never knew how to get that idea across without dragging. I grasped what it was going for pretty quickly and then the rest just felt pointless. The main problem is that it outlasts its welcome, continuing on and dragging on when the point has already been made yet it keeps on rollin', much like this review.
Grade: B-


Movies Watched: 9
- Surveillance
- Choke
- Comedy's Dirtiest Dozen
- Heavyweights of Comedy
- Grizzly Man
- Family Guy: Something Something Dark Side
- Babel
- Where the Wild Things Are (blu)
- Gran Torino (blu)
New Movies Bought: 142
- Triangle
- Psycho Ward
- Summer's Moon
- Smash Cut
- Family Guy: Something Something Dark Side
- Blood Wedding
- Carmen
- El Amor Brujo
- Straw Dogs
- Thieves Highway
- Devil Doll
- Night on Earth
- Equinox
- I am Waiting
- Rusty Knife
- Take Aim at the Police Van
- Cruel Gun Story
- Colt is My Passport
- Make Way For Tomorrow
- Haunted Strangler
- Corridors of Blood
- First Man into Space
- Atomic Submarine
- Homicide
- La Haine
- Sisters (de Palma)
- That Hamilton Woman
- Chance
- Skin and Bones
- Eater
- Sacrifice
- Community
- In Sickness and In Health
- Spooked
- Family Man (Fear Itself)
- New Year's Day
- Something with Bite
- Spirit Box
- Echoes
- Circle
- 13 Frightened Girls
- Old Dark House (Castle)
- Mr. Sardonicus
- Silent Venom
- Hideous
- Bloodsuckers
- Jaws The Revenge
- The Flying Serpent
- Slaughter
- Onibaba
- Chaos
- Black Magic Rites
- Devil's Plaything
- Ritos de Frankenstein
- Zotz
- Royal Tramp
- Royal Tramp 2
- Raptor
- Scorpius Gigantus
- Rape of the Vampire
- Wig
- Witchboard ('05)
- The Blob (original)
- Haxan
- Viva le Tour
- Humain Trop Humain
- Place de la Republique
- Phantom India
- Calcutta
- God's Country
- And the Pursuit of Happiness
- House of Games
- Ghost Train
- Alligator People
- Hills Have Eyes 2 (Craven)
- Naked Kiss
- The Last Emperor
- Django Kill
- Speed Grapher Complete Series
- La Cercle Rouge
- Trainman
- Quai des Orfevres
- White Sheik
- Port of Shadows
- Mannaja
- Intercessor: Another Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare
- Junk
- Juon: Curse
- Killer Condom
- Passion
- Horror of Blood Monsters
- Tomb of the Werewolf
- Fiend Without a Face
- Coup de Torchon
- Bronson
- Triangle (Lam)
- Rise of the Gargoyles
- Farcry
- Hard Revenge Milly
- Hard Revenge Milly: Bloody Battle
- Ashes of Time Redux
- Diary
- Vampire Killers
- Big Fan
- Alone in the Dark 2
- Forbidden Games
- Fallen Idol
- Grand Illusion
- Tales of Hoffman
- Small Back Room
- Trafic
- Blood of a Poet
- Orpheus
- Testament of Orpheus
- A Canterbury Tale
- Stray Dog
- Triad Election
- Kill Theory
- The Reeds
- Zombies of Mass Destruction
- The Final
- Dread
- Hidden
- The Graves
- Lake Mungo
- GI Samurai
- Ninja Wars
- Legend of the Eight Samurai
- Resurrection of Golden Wolf
- Scream (80's)
- SS Hell Camp
- Gestapo's Last Orgy
- Red Nights of the Gestapo
- Le Samourai
- Possession (blu)
- Monsoon Wedding (blu)
- Pierrot le Fou (blu)
- Paris, Texas (blu)
- Revanche (blu)
- Hunger (blu)
- Fearless (blu)
- Pandorum (blu)
Unseen DVDS: 3254
Unseen Blu-rays: 71
Unseen VHS: 119

Ultra-Megazord Update

I wish I had more time in the last few weeks to update this so that the posts wouldn't have to take so much time, but hey, what are you gonna do? A constant stream of projects have left me pretty much devoid of time and energy to keep up with it, yet I've had enough time to spend pretty big chunks of our tax return, to the point that I actually feel exhausted from buying movies. Oy vey. On to the few films I've been able to eek out.



This was a movie my wife had seen when she was younger and really enjoyed, thus sending me on a quest to find it, which was difficult at first since she couldn't remember the name of it. After a somewhat lengthy search, we finally tracked it down, leaving me somewhat surprised that Le Femme Nikita was in it which made it more interesting for me to see it. However, after all that, it was somewhat disappointing to see that it was on par with most of the generic thrillers USA and Cinemax used to dabble in at three in the morning on a Thursday. Right off the bat we get William Baldwin, easily the most useless Baldwin, which soured me almost immediately. I think the best performance he ever gave was in an M&M's commercial. I don't think Anne Parillaud worked on improving her English in the eight years betwenn Innocent Blood which only hurt the performance of the film all the more. The film has a lot of intriguing ideas, but it just doesn't have the budget or talent to really pull them off, though some neat scenes do pop up every now and then, such as the old house filled with crabs. The film was at least interesting enough to keep me wanting to see how everything played out but it feels like there's a better movie somewhere waiting to break free.
Grade: C-


At one point in my life, I actually used to look forward to spoof films. Airplane and the Naked Gun movies were favorites growing up. In recent years, they're probably the most repugnant form of film to me outside of dance movies and inspirational teacher movies. Even though this was directed by the same guy in charge of the old movies, this is still just as stupid and unfunny as any others being put out, though I do give it credit for having less fart jokes than your average spoof movie. It was somewhat decent in the beginning with a few jokes actually hitting home, but as it kept going, it got more and more tedious to watch. By the end, it had stopped even trying to be funny and was just trying to convince people to quit bitching about the war and that George Bush wasn't so bad which was about the last goddamn thing I wanted to hear,especially in what should of been a breezy dumbass comedy.
Grade: D






For everything I liked about this movie, there was something else that I didn't. While the subject matter is certainly compelling, I couldn't help but feel that the filmmakers were just using the subject matter to make a name for themselves. The subjects in the film are sincere (save for one vapid and callous bitch that almost made me throw the remote across the room) and tell their stories, but there's a sense that while there is a message in their segments, the filmmakers don't seem to grasp it themselves and every segment seems a bit shortchanged, almost as if they're just biding their time to show some more "sweet" clips of people jumping to their deaths. While it is compelling enough to watch, I could never shake the feeling that this felt like some surface level art school cliches that picked a subject they knew people would want to see.
Grade: C






Speaking of spoof movies...I'll be honest, the only reason I have this is because Best Buy had the blu-ray for only 7 bucks and I had a five dollar gift certificate to use. After years of horrible spoof movies, as well as having already been soured on An American Carol, my expectations were pretty piss poor for this one. To my surprise, I ended up enjoying it for the most part. It actually made me laugh, which is more than I can say for the last few Scary Movie films. It was nice seeing them have fun with horror movie cliches again, something Scary Movie lost a long time ago. I even enjoyed the character of Stan Helsing himself who looks like an uber-douche upon first seeing him. Even the typical annoying blond wasn't too bad and provided some decent jokes, even if her running gag got pretty damn stale by the end. In fact, the whole movie tends to run out of steam in the last third where it felt a little too aimless for me. And I still don't care for Kenen or Kel or whoever the hell he played at all. I'll go ahead and eat my own hat to say I actually had a decent time with this one.
Grade: C+






The best thing about this movie? It's a truly emotional, meaningful film that is 100% free of the typical pap and manipulation of the audience that makes up pretty much all of the usual tearjerkers shelled out. This movie is completely genuine and leaves you better off after having seen it. It's one of the best films to touch on lives lived and lost that really hits home in the final scenes. And even though it only makes up a small section of the film, the scenes dealing with an outsider's view of Japan are far greater than the vastly overrated Lost in Translation. The photography is top notch as well, where not a single frame is wasted and always ties in to film in some way.The less I say the better. This is one of the better films I've seen in the last few years and I'd recommend it to anyone looking for an honest story free of the normal pandering we usually get.
Grade: A






I had enjoyed another documentary, called Star Woids, about a group of people lined up for the premiere of Episode 1 and I was hoping for something similar with this, even though I knew it was made by a completely different group of filmmakers. I guess the law of diminishing returns works even on completely unrelated projects. One big problem is that there's not really anyone to like in this film. Everyone's kind of either a jerk or a douchebag so there's not really anything enjoyable about watching them. The only real interesting aspect of this is to see exactly how this people function as a society in their obsession. That, and there's a great part where some Hot Topic dipshits get the crap knocked out of them. It also isn't shot very well. You can tell this wasn't a group of professional filmmakers. Other than that, it came, it went, and I was over it.
Grade: C-

Star Wait- Star Wars nerds beat up punk rockers - watch more funny videos

For those comic nerds who haven't caught the recent crop of animated DTV comic book movies, you really are missing out. While the Marvel films are typically hit or miss, the DC films are usually well worth checking out. The last Justice League movie, New Frontier, was one of their best ones and so I was looking forward to this one quite a bit. While it wasn't as good or as engaging as the other one, it was still a decent watch. One of the most interesting aspects of these films is to see what actors are brought on board to play the roles with the highlight of this film belonging to James Woods as Owlman. At first, it seems as though he's playing the role rather flat, it becomes apparent that he's going for a more icy, mellow tone that really brings out how unbalanced and nihilistic his character is the longer the film goes on. Another good thing about these films is that they try to get viewers accustomed to other characters than the typical Batman and Superman stories, with the Martian Manhunter getting a good spotlight role in this one. In fact, Batman sits out on a big chunk of the movie but it does a good job of building up to when he becomes involved. The middle section drags too much which I find to be an issue with a lot of these for some reason, but at the same time, it's almost maddening how they shorten the story to fit into a needless sub-70 minute running time. It;s not like they have to worry about getting as many showings in a day as possible like theatrical films so I'm not sure why they do this. This wasn't as good as a lot of the Justice League episodes you can catch on TV but it is worth a watch sometime. I'm really looking forward to the next release, Batman: Under the Red Hood, which is an interesting pick for an animated movie and should be fairly fucked up to see.
Grade: C+






This one was more for my wife and son than for me actually having a desire to watch it. It's your average Disney story. Talking animals, some quest or adventure, some bumbling sidekicks for comedic relief, a lesson learned, and a montage set to a song by no-longer-so-hot singer. It's hard for me to really critique something like this as it's not really bad or offensive but it also doesn't really bring anything new to the table. Though, it was nice seeing the MacKenzie Brothers again, even in moose form.
Grade: C






What could have been a favorite is ruined by such a degree of uneven characterization that I just can't overlook it. The idea, execution, and special effects of the film are top notch but the one character we are saddled with and have to spend so much time with is such an unlikeable son of a bitch that I could have cared less for him. He was a weaselly asshole that only cared about himself, which would have been fine if that was truly what they wanted, but not for a second did I ever buy his "redemption," though I don't blame that on the actor so much as I do on just sloppy writing. And at the same time, the movie did such a good job of showing how awful and nasty the aliens are I could care less about them as well, leaving only the prawn Christopher Johnson and his son to be the only engaging characters in the whole movie. Other than that, why should I give a damn about anyone or anything in this movie? Really, the only reason it's enjoyable at all is because of the visual spectacle which completely sells the alien inhabitants as believable and when the action kicks in, it leaves your jaw on the floor. The alien weapons create a kind of damage I can't even remember seeing before in a film. On the strength of that coupled with the success of the idea itself does the film manage to find some footing and be enjoyable.
Grade: B-






I think Jody Hill is probably the greatest comedy filmmaker working today (take that Judd Apatow!). Between The Foot Fist Way, Observe and Report, and this, he's already had a better run than most comedic directors have in the course of a decade. His sense of humor is absolutely pitch perfect and does a great job of making you feel awful that he just made you laugh out loud. The situations are so horrible and serious for the characters but hilarious to the viewer that it makes you uncomfortable for finding it all hilarious. The ending of the fifth episode actually had me laughing so hard I couldn't breathe, which the last time that happened might have been back when I watched Arrested Development so many years ago. It also helps that Danny McBride is probably the funniest working actor around today. I'm even tempted to watch Land of the Lost just for him. His character is one of the most delusional and self-destructive guys to have his own series. He's a walking disaster that you inexplicably can't help but like. It looks like it is getting a second season which is great news because these six episodes are way too little of such a great character.
Grade: A




Movies Watched: 10
- Shattered Image
- An American Carol
- The Bridge
- Cherry Blossoms
- Star Wait
- Brother Bear 2
- Eastbound and Down Season 1
- Stan Helsing (blu)
- Justice League Crisis on Two Earths (blu)
- District 9 (blu)
New Movies Bought: 190
+ Sand Serpents
+ Grizzly Man
+ The Hanging Woman
+ Vice Squad
+ Corpse Vanishes (MST3K Version)
+ Warrior of the Lost World (MST3K Version)
+ Santa Claus (MST3K Version)
+ Night of the Blood Beast (MST3K Version)
+ The True Story of the Nun of Monza
+ Nuns of St. Archangel
+ Images in a Convent
+ Rabid
+ The Night Porter
+ Grand Slam
+ Hamlet (Lawrence Olivier)
+ Winnie the Pooh: Heffalump Halloween Movie
+ Murder Loves Killers Too
+ Grindstone Road
+ Kamikaze Girls
+ To Live
+ The Little Polar Bear
+ Pep Squad
+ Small Town Folk
+ The Unbearable Lightness of Being
+ Prison-A-Go-Go
+ Razorback
+ Fright ('50s)
+ Stark Fear
+ Frankenstein and the Monster From Hell
+ Argento: An Eye for Horror
+ H-Man
+ Battle in Outer Space
+ Mothra (original)
+ Escape 2000
+ Peeping Tom
+ Le Trou
+ Le Corbeau
+ Flesh for Frankenstein
+ Alphaville
+ Mayerling
+ Le Jour Se Leve
+ Gervaise
+ Last Holiday
+ Greased Lighting
+ The Mack
+ Uptown Saturday Night
+ Eastbound and Down Season 1
+ City of Rott
+ Exotica
+ Ichi the Killer 0 (anime)
+ The Mummy's Shroud
+ Plague of Zombies
+ The Killer Must Kill Again
+ From Within
+ The Broken
+ Ring Virus
+ Snuff
+ The Seduction
+ Salems Lot (original)
+ The Gate
+ The Stepfather (original)
+ Campfire Tales
+ The Last Horror Film
+ They Don't Cut the Grass Anymore
+ Burial of the Rats
+ Gummo
+ Web of the Spider
+ Mr Show Season 3
+ Lost Season 2
+ Star Wait
+ Frozen ('96)
+ Last of the Living
+ One Missed Call: Final
+ Wild Man of the Navidad
+ Shuttle
+ Ghost Machine
+ Fear(s) of the Dark
+ Brother Bear 2
+ Curse of the Demon
+ Shrink
+ Dark Mirror
+ Albino Farm
+ Shattered Image
+ Bizarre
+ Night of Death
+ The Flesh and the Fiends
+ The Old Dark House ('32)
+ The Bridge
+ Overnight
+ Calamari Wrestler
+ Black Mama White Mama
+ Running Out of Time 2
+ Pervert
+ Killer Buzz
+ Pusher 2
+ Pusher 3
+ Blood Car
+ Spirits of the Dead
+ Crowley
+ Kidnapping of the President
+ Deathrow Gameshow
+ Walking Dead
+ Frankenstein 1970
+ You'll Find Out
+ Zombies on Broadway
+ Hunchback of Notre Dame ('39)
+ The Princess and the Warrior
+ The Brain That Wouldn't Die (MST3K Version)
+ Golden Years
+ End of the Line
+ Great Expectations (David Lean)
+ Picnic at Hanging Rock
+ Withnail and I
+ Gozu
+ The Telling
+ Messiah of Evil
+ The Strangeness
+ Between the Covers
+ Swinging Wives
+ Doctor Death
+ Derby
+ Running Hot
+ Stunt Rock
+ Deliver Us From Evil
+ The Fox Affair
+ Velvet Trap
+ Hot Nights on the Campus
+ Silent Scream
+ Trapped
+ Pets
+ Goodbye Gemini
+ Hoop Dreams
+ Night of the Dribbler
+ Weekend Murders
+ Riot on 42nd St.
+ Choke Canyon
+ Hot Moves
+ Teenage Mother
+ Teenage Graffiti
+ The Hit
+ Stranger Than Paradise
+ Hell's Ground
+ Brainiac
+ Beales of Grey Gardens
+ Masculin Feminine
+ Seance
+ Seance on a Wet Afternoon
+ Tokyo Zombie
+ Blast of Silence
+ Life of Brian
+ An American Carol
+ Perkins 14
+ Superman/Batman: Public Enemies
+ My Lucky Stars
+ Management
+ Tyson
+ Night Train
+ Showdown in Little Tokyo
+ Killing Room
+ Ghost Writer
+ Storytelling
+ Retribution
+ Wind in the Willows
+ Air Guitar Nation
+ Vinyan
+ Carriers
+ Deadgirl
+ The Scourge
+ Wild Country
+ The Shortcut
+ Chocolate (blu)
+ Gran Torino (blu)
+ Underworld: Rise of the Lycans (blu)
+ Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths (blu)
+ 100 Feet (blu)
+ The International (blu)
+ The Wrestler (blu)
+ Sands of Oblivion (blu)
+ Stan Helsing (blu)
+ Where the Wild Things Are (blu)
+ Hardware (blu)
+ District 9 (blu)
+ Cyclops (blu)
+ Sukiyaki Western Django (blu)
+ Never Say Never Again (blu)
+ Jennifer's Body (blu0
+ Give Em Hell, Malone (blu)
+ Red Mist (blu)
+ Amusement (blu)
+ Appaloosa (blu)
Unseen DVDS: 3127
Unseen Blu-rays: 65
Unseen VHS: 119

It's like with every step forward, I take 20 steps back.